In July of this year, I became part of a very exclusive club. I did not apply to join the club, nor did I want to be a member. I am one of the approximately 2700 men who will be diagnosed with breast cancer this year. Thankfully, I became aware of some changes in my left breast area that did not appear normal to me. Initially, I thought it was the result of the heart surgery that I had in March of 2022 and some on-going damage to my pectoral muscle. After seeing a dermatologist, and being referred for a biopsy, it was confirmed that I was a new member of this very exclusive club. Less than three percent of those diagnosed with breast cancer are men.

Strangely, the weekend after I received the results of the biopsy there appeared in the Sunday Hartford Courant an article about a gentleman who had also been diagnosed with breast cancer, but at a later stage, and the ordeal he had endured. The article was meant to alert men to the fact that men could indeed also have breast cancer and that early detection was important. Men are notorious for ignoring the signs of health concerns and avoiding doctors until the last possible minute.

As I write this, we are in the midst of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. When I see the commercials or other reminders including the pink ribbons, I have to remind myself that I am included in these reminders. I am not sure if I have been experiencing denial, or simply in the beginning stages of this journey, but I often have to be reminded that I have cancer. It is possible that the diagnosis might have seemed more real if the diagnosis had been a more common cancer afflicting men. Its sounds strange to say, but the disconnect might possibly be because I was not sick in any way when I was diagnosed.

I was very fortunate to be recommended to see one of the best breast cancer surgeons in the area. Everyone I spoke to about Dr. Eisenberg raved about him. When I finally met him for the first time I understood why. He spent a good deal of time with my wife and me providing as much information as needed and patiently answering any and all questions. He was informative and also exhibited a great sense of humor and compassion. My baseline attitude about almost everything in life is to avoid getting overly excited or worried. My favorite saying is “It is what it is”. Panicking and worrying does not change the reality. I try to simply gather the necessary information and handle the problem. This situation was no different.

Dr Eisenberg shared that he would perform a mastectomy on the left breast. He explained that it would be a simple removal of the breast tissue with no reconstruction necessary. Depending on some further testing, he might also have to remove some lymph nodes as well. He explained the range of possibilities as well as the possible ramifications. He also indicated that he would further examine the pathology of the initial biopsy to pinpoint the exact origin of the cancer.

Further study of the pathology and biopsy indicated that the tumor was generated through what is referred to as ER and PR. Simply put that means that I have been emitting an excess of estrogen and progesterone. Just what every guy wants to hear. You have too much estrogen.
One of the first things that was recommended was receiving genetic testing to determine whether I have the BRCA gene. This was important step to provide vital information to my three children, especially my two daughters. Fortunately, the results were negative. I am not a carrier of the gene, which understandably was comforting news to my two daughters.

I was quickly scheduled for a mammogram and an ultrasound to examine my lymph nodes. Having a mammogram was an interesting experience. Despite the apparent oddity of the situation, the technician treated me like any other patient and went through the process. The ultrasound demonstrated at least one abnormality, and I was scheduled for a biopsy.

The biopsy showed that the lymph node in question was positive which meant that an excision of several of the lymph nodes would be necessary.
Dr. Eisenberg was still expressing some hope that if the positive lymph node was a singleton, and the only sign of the cancer beginning to travel, I might avoid chemotherapy and radiation treatments. The other possible result of additional positive lymph nodes requiring removal could be a condition called lymphedema. This is a condition that results in the inability of fluid to be removed from the arm normally and could be treated with physical therapy and wearing arm compression sleeves regularly.

On September 19th I had the surgery. Remarkably, it was day surgery. I arrived at the very well-appointed Hartford Healthcare Surgery Center in Blue Back Square in West Hartford at 7:30 am and was back home by 12:30 pm. All of the breast tissue and the nipple from my left breast was removed along with sixteen lymph nodes, six of which tested positive. I came home with a bandaged incision, two drains which were affectionately referred to in the business as “hand grenades” due to the shape of the receptacles, and a very tight and restricting, eight-inch wide, ace bandage wrapped around my chest.

I was given some pain medication but only took two doses that day and no more after that. The pain was more nagging than severe. My job was to relax and rest while emptying my “hand grenades” twice daily and measuring the output. I was visited by a home health nurse every other day. The best part of that was removing the ace bandage which was the worst part of the recovery. I was allowed to take showers after a few days but the process was awkward with two drains hanging off me. I eventually devised a system that involved pinning the receptacles to a bandana I had tied around my elbow so I could freely use both hands. It is amazing how simple things like that hack can lead to significant enjoyment in life. We take enjoying a shower for granted until it is no longer possible.

I was unable to sleep in a bed because of the incision and drains, so I slept in a recliner which was more than comfortable. I had no more trouble sleeping than someone approaching seventy would normally have. It was frustrating being confined to home and not being able to do anything strenuous. I read more than usual, tried to play my guitar as much as possible and decided this would be a good time to devote more time to my blog. For the first time ever, I had to pay someone to do the lawn work and relied on my wife for any and all trips to the doctor or to watch one of the grandsons’ games.

At the first post-surgery appointment with Dr. Eisenberg, he shared the news that six of the lymph nodes had tested positive which would mean some level of both chemotherapy and radiation. I had hoped to avoid one or both, but it was not to be. He and his staff assured me that chemotherapy was not the ordeal that too many had suffered in the past. New medications and combinations of medications greatly lessened the severity of nausea and exhaustion. The worst part of radiation besides the possible skin issues was the frequency; six weeks, fives days a week. It will take much longer to drive to and from the appointment and set up for the treatment than the actual treatment which is approximately ten to fifteen minutes in duration.

I was sent for a bone scan which showed no obvious cancer and a CT scan which was also clean. The negative scans provide some cautious confidence that I will not have to worry about a recurrence of breast cancer cell post treatments. Of course, as is the case with all things in life, except death and taxes, there are no guarantees.

Although I am not sure many would blame me if I were a little angry or annoyed that I have been visited by cancer, I am well aware that I am very fortunate in many respects. First of all, the cancer was detected somewhat early and was confined in terms of type and location making it much more manageable and treatable. In addition, I am careful not to equate this particular type of cancer with what a woman must face with the same diagnosis. It is just not the same. Lastly, I am very fortunate to have great health insurance that covers everything and more. I do not have the added burden of worrying about how I will pay for treatments. That is a luxury that every person should have.

At this point, I am looking at the multitude of appointments, and whatever discomfort comes with them, as the price for being healthy and cancer-free again. I will approach them as part of the regular daily process and move forward trying to keep things as normal and productive as possible. Life will not come to a halt to make way for the treatments. The treatments will be built around and into my life. Hopefully by springtime I will be able to mow my own lawn (although I kind of like watching someone else do it) and be out on the golf course playing poorly again.